Latest Blog

Infertile couples paying a heavy price for Labor

Sunday 24th May 2009

Abigail Rose Morrison was born on the seventh day of the seventh month of the seventh year of our new century.

She is our miracle child, the answer to a lifetime of prayer and 14 years of painful, invasive, heartbreaking fertility treatment.

Incredibly, Abbey was conceived naturally (and, we think, divinely).

But I have no doubt the lessons of 10 failed IVFs and associated surgery played a critical role in Jenny and I realising our dream. It has also given me first-hand insight into families who are seeking to become families.

The desire to have children is the most positive, life-affirming instinct we have as human beings.

This desire doesn't go away when you're told you cannot have children. The determination and sacrifice of families seeking to realise this dream by taking advantage of fertility treatments is nothing short of inspirational.

The feeling of loss at every failed attempt is indescribable. As others, removed from the emotional hell, rationalise the failure as "embryos failing to take", as parents we grieve the loss of children.

We console ourselves with the thought that one day, we'll be reunited with our unborn beyond this life.

Added to the physical and emotional torment is the pressure it places on fragile relationships.

My beautiful wife never gave up hope. Her ability to face disappointment time and again, then line up to put herself through it all again, qualifies her as mother of the year, a thousand times over.

Most families understand the sacrifice involved in having children after they have arrived, when it's accompanied by the joy of parenthood.

But for those going through fertility treatment, their first experience is only sacrifice - and for many, the joy never comes.

The pain of these experiences is not altered by your level of income, regardless of how little or how much you have. You do what you have to do to make it work.

For families going through this dark chapter of their lives, it's all-consuming - spiritually, emotionally, physically and financially. You question everything: God, each other, your priorities, your future - nothing escapes.

Along this road, you will find the wreckage of shattered lives, marriages and families. These are the risks we take.

I can think of no more deserving set of parents than a mother and father who would risk everything to bring their child into the world. That is an expression of love that more children in our community deserve to know.

It's clear from this year's budget that the Rudd government either just doesn't get it or just doesn't care.

Its decision to force these families to pay an extra $2000 per cycle of IVF treatment is heartless.

In addition to the incredible burden already being carried by these families, they have now been told they are undeserving of continuing support.

Kevin Rudd can seek to justify this any way he likes, but the truth is that it will quench the last flame of hope for many couples desperate for a family.

As one family receives their $900 in cash hand-outs, on top of thousands last year, another childless family will sit down and decide whether this is the end of their road.

The decision by the Rudd government betrays a complete inability to consider the human consequences of its actions.

In a Budget dripping with spending, following months or reckless largesse, infertile couples are being asked to pay the price.

The Prime Minister has sought to cast the measure as cracking down on overcharging doctors and undeserving families. This is as deceitful as it is insulting.

Were it not for the dedication, skill and professionalism of fertility specialists and surgeons, we wouldn't have our Abbey today and I mightn't have Jenny either. How do you put a price on that?

In a few weeks, Jenny and I will be blessed with our second child -- once again from natural conception, which often occurs in these situations.

Our story has a happy ending, but for many this will not be the case. I hope it offers hope to others.

Everyone who goes through this process knows the risks. What they shouldn't have to put up with is a Government that says they don't deserve our support.

This blog is also featured as an article in today's Sunday Telegraph www.news.com.au/story/0,,25527239-5007146,00.html

Comments

Add a comment

31/05/09 12:57 PM - Andrew

Dear Scott

The article in today's SMH/essential baby drew me to come across to your site and leave a comment.

Thank-you for sharing such a personal story, which is shared by so many.

We need more politicians like you, who bring a wealth of experience and a willingness to share it when explaining their policy positions.

31/05/09 10:10 AM - James

Given your clear understanding of the personal desire to have a child that all families hold I assume we can rely on you to advocate for the rights of Gay and Lesbian people to have full access to both IVF and adoption?

After all 'The desire to have children is the most positive, life-affirming instinct we have as human beings.'

29/05/09 11:56 AM - Annon

Thank you so much for sharing your story and for trying to oppose IVF funding cuts.

My husband and I are currently going through IVF and it is not an easy path. Even with government subsidies it is expensive. I can't believe that the government is going to implement changes which will make it even more difficult for couples who are already going through great emotion in their lives.

Unless you have experienced the grief of infertility and miscarriage I doubt that anyone would be quite aware of the impact it can have on a persons day to day life. The grief is ongoing. Mourning because of a failed cycle, utter devastation at yet another miscarriage. Yes, some people go on to live fulfilling lives without children, but for my husband and I this is not an option we want to consider without first exhausting all possible options (including IVF) first.

I beg you to please continue to support our cause. In my opinion there has not been enough coverage of this in the media and the lack of public knowledge of what the government is intending to do is just devastating.

I have sent off numerous emails to politicians. Furthermore I have spoken to many family and friends about this issue to try and create some kind of public knowledge about the government’s plans. I strongly encourage those affected by Mr Rudd’s heartless decision to keep fighting this, as it is the only way that we can even try to stop this very cruel funding cut.

29/05/09 10:24 AM - Scott Morrison

Thank you to everyone so far for sharing your comments. The real inspiration for this initiative is my wife Jenny and all those wowen who do the heavy lifting on carrying this burden. As a politician you are always very careful about sharing your private life, especially issues involving your family. However Jenny thought this was to important not to speak up on. We're both very glad that our story has encouraged others, and we're just so incredible sorry for those who are still waiting for their miracle. If you would like to take further action go to www.savemedicare.com.au to support the campaign. Yestderday in the parliament I asked Julia Gillard whether she supported her Government's decision, given that in 2005 she described this as cruel and solicited more than 1300 signatures on her peteition to stop any such changes. She refused to answer and hid behind the Speakers ruling. We need to keep the pressure on.

29/05/09 10:20 AM - anon2

We have spent more than 6 years trying to conceive, of which more than 3 years were spent on IVF - emotionally and financially draining even when government subsidised. We finally conceived and are expecting our first child soon. Although we cannot deny the wonderment of the pregnancy and the impending birth, and are delighted at the prospect of having our own child, we would just as readily have gone down the adoption track if it had been possible. We looked into both adoption and fostering and neither was feasible.

I think in some ways many IVF couples would be helped by putting a cap on how many times we put ourselves through this emotionally gruelling process, but how this is done needs to be thought through extremely carefully and consultatively and should be sufficiently flexible to be responsive to the different ways in which people experience infertility. It is not a 'one size fits all' procedure by any stretch of the imagination. At the same time, there needs to be a radical review of adoption and fostering practices and procedures to make both more accessible to infertile couples.

And finally, to respond to the comment earlier that lots of people live without children and can lead full and happy lives - that may be so, and I certainly always felt that before we started trying to conceive (both my partner and I were leading full, happy and productive lives). However, what I now know more intimately than I would wish on anyone is an indescribable grief that is hard for those who haven't experienced it to understand.

29/05/09 09:46 AM - Vivien

Thank you for sharing your story. As for the Sara who decided that you "wasted" tax payers money, she obviously has no knowledge of infertility. Many people will attest that they were only able to naturally conceive a second child after receiving IVF treatment for the first one (Jessica Rowe and Brooke Shields are two famous examples that come to mind). Perhaps Sara should do some research before mouthing off on a topic she clearly knows very little about. Good luck to you and your family. Regards.

29/05/09 09:36 AM - Moo

Thankyou Scott, for allowing others to hopefully understand the heartbreaking and costly process of IVF.
In 2008 my husband and I had four unsuccessful IVF attempts. This year is our 'recovery year' (emotionally and financially) and we had all intentions of starting up again in 2010. This now looks to be unlikely due to the new changes the Government will be putting into place. Unless we win lotto, the Government has forced us to accept the fact that we could well remain childless forever. Not an easy realisation.

I think a lot of people don't realise that even with the existing rebates, IVF is not free. Far from it in fact. Not to mention all the in-between appointments, tests, and exploratory procedures that seem to come with the territory.
And no-one ever thinks they will need to go to IVF once, let alone 4 or 10 times, so how can you properly save or prepare for that expense? When everyone, including the doctors, nurses, friends, families, tell you to never give up, the next cycle might just be the one that works... how can you simply give up and walk away from that hope or possibility?

I wonder if Kevin Rudd or Wayne Swan would have made the same decision if any of their own children or friends needed fertility treatment?

Thanks again Scott, and would love to know more about how to support any endeavour in getting the government to change this ruling.

29/05/09 09:18 AM - Elizabeth

We are the unlucky ones. 13 cycles, one with miscarriage at 8 weeks, nearly $80,000 poorer. I would have kept going too. We borrowed money on 3 credit cards, then finally had to extend our mortgage because we couldnt keep up with payments. It would have been worth every single penny if we had conceived successfully.
We never quite understood why it took 8 weeks for Medicare to send out the cheques, one staff member at Medicare made a snide comment that we were getting a bigger 'handout' than we should have anyway. I was appalled, bet she had children. We never even knew that we needed ivf till it was almost too late. My husband is technically infertile and we could never have conceived naturally. Sadly, to compound this, I was rejected at the end because of my age. Another burden. If I am willing to pay, why on earth cant I keep going. If someone like the Rupert Murdoch's of the world can have children at over 70, why should I be denied that right, why am I condemned by the media and society.

29/05/09 08:31 AM - Chuck

A wonderful article Scott - raising my attention to a key issue that i wasn't previously aware of.

29/05/09 08:20 AM - Jenny

Thanks for standing up for IVF couples everywhere. It's not something anyone would ever choose and it's a very hard road - and as you point out so well, even after all that sacrifice sometimes success doesn't follow. The emotional burden is enormous - adding to the financial burden is heartless. For a government that gives a 'bonus' every time a baby is born, it seems inconsistent to not make it as easy as possible for those wanting to have children to have them. My story ends happily with healthy boy-girl twins conceived by anonymous donor eggs and IVF who are now three. I thank those working in the health sector who do this work every day.

29/05/09 07:44 AM - Oakley

It is an expensive choice that you make regardless of governmental policy.
There are other ways of having a family without going through all that you described in your blog.
I find your blog a little over emotive and self-indulgent but i do wish you and your family the best with your second child.

28/05/09 11:53 PM - Brooke

Thank you so much for your story. It brought tear to my eyes. My husband and I spent over 5 years on fertility treatments with no positive result until our 3rd attempt at IVF, where I fell pregnant with my darling daughter who is now 16 months old. I was lucky enough to have wealthy in-laws who helped us with the costs of IVF. I am an Australian, living in Mexico so I could not ask for government assistance. Without someone else helping to pay for the treatments I would not have been able to afford it and therefore not have been able to experience the wonderful miracle of motherhood. My heart goes out to those who suffer from whatever type of infertility they might have. It is a very long, stressful journey. Why the government feel that they need to hurt the infertile couple even more, beats me. Obviously Mr Rudd has not experienced this type of struggle at all in his life. As Jade commented before, you never know if infertility is going to affect someone close to you. And yes, it is a medical condition. Why can´t it be treated just like any other medical condition?

28/05/09 10:55 PM - Rebecca

Hi,
I dont think couples who try and try to concieve should have to pay at all, it should be covered by medicare. There are people like my husband and I who cannot afford IVF at all and we cannot concieve after 4 years of trying, which makes me upset everyday as its the only thing we want the most.

Most people we know - you ask them what do you want the most they all answer with material things and yet all we want is our own child to give all our love and total commitment to, i cant express how much love with both have to give a little baby!

So maybe K rudd needs to think about it STOP CHUCKING MONEY AROUND and use it for something that IS important!!!

28/05/09 09:21 PM - ceres

I'm so glad you have a beautiful child. However I also have to point out the reality of life. In an ideal world we wouldn't have to prioritize. The reality is we do. For any person on a waiting list for a hip replacement or other medical procedure who has been waiting for a year and is in pain, I consider they have as valid a claim as you, for funding. Yes there is huge waste but even if there wasn't there will never be enough to fulfill everyone's expectations.

28/05/09 08:51 PM - Secondary infertility

Thank you Scott Morrison.

28/05/09 05:21 PM - Angela

Thank you for your true account of what fertility treatment is like each and every cycle. I can not understand a Government who wants to punish those who are already punishing themselves over and over each cycle with 'what ifs' and 'if onlys'. To say those couples are undeserving is just not right. However financial assistance is giving out hand over fist to those who are already not contributing financially to the growth of our economy and country. I just dont get it.

28/05/09 05:07 PM - Originalp

I agree with everything you've said, here but what's really needed is an action plan to force the Government to retract this budgetary measure. If it has been put in place to prevent certain specialists from gauging, then I suggest the correct approach would be to regulate the fertility industry far more tightly to prevent specialists charging for ludicrous services. For example, I paid $32.50 for my husband to sit in the chair next to me whenever I had a consultation with the specialist. Medicare refunded that cost 100%, but in my opinion, it should never have been charged.

28/05/09 04:27 PM - Anon

Thank you for publishing that in the Sunday Tele and letting EB publish it on thei home page. I've being doing IVF for over a year now unsuccessfully, and if this bill passes that will be it for us. Infertile couples have it very hard in Australia. Adoption is disgustingly hard, there's no commerical surrogracy arrangements and now IVF has been ruined.

28/05/09 04:12 PM - Sara

If you conceived naturally, then really you ended up wasting thousands of taxpayer dollars on trying IVF.
I understand and respect your point of view and I am really happy that you and your wife managed to have a child naturally. But the point is that taxpayers shouldn't have to fork out millions of dollars for IVF. The money should go to helping the living who are medically sick and need medical treatment to live. At the end of the day, IVF is an ELECTIVE treatment. You can live without children. Thousands of people live full lives without having their own kids. It is your choice to have kids.

28/05/09 03:36 PM - Rose

Taking away a very generous subsidy is not the same as punishing the group who were getting it. Yes, IVF is very very expensive, and many people can't pay for it without the huge government subsidy. But the money currently going to IVF is not a gift from the government, it's also money that isn't going towards other deserving issues. Consider seriously ill people who need expensive medication. Should they die when they could be treated successfully, because it's more important to use the money for their medication to create a new life? Don't tell me it doesn't happen - all money spent, especially in the health system, represents a lost opportunity elsewhere. As someone who would probably(statistically) be dead without government subsidised medication, and as someone who may not be able to have their own children naturally, I'd rather live and have the opportunity to adopt, or foster, or just be a great aunty.

28/05/09 01:09 PM - Jade

Thank you so much for so eloquently expressing the emotions we've also felt throughout our journey with IVF. Even if fertile readers had no trouble conceiving, it's important to remember that their children may one day face a battle with infertility and need IVF. I'm appalled that the government is restricting access to medical treatment for a medical condition - with no qualms whatsoever. We're an easy target because we're at the mercy of clinics to create our families - I just have to hope that articles like this will garner support to ensure the changes to the Medicare safety net are rejected.

27/05/09 09:43 PM - Anonymous

Reading your article in Sunday's paper brought tears to my eyes. My husband and I were a very lucky couple- we only needed 2 cycles of ICSI to conceive our daughter and another 2 cycles to conceive again, I am 7 months pregnant. What moved me the most was your personal and emotional account of going through IVF. What angered me the most was the decision made by the current government to further 'punish' infertile or 'subfertile' couples by making them pay even more for fertility treatments. It's not bad enough that couples have trouble falling pregnant, but now that have to pay increased fees. Why? I'm not too sure. What I am sure about is that it's a frustrating thing to work hard, pay an increased rate of tax and see this money go increasingly towards families with children (where typically only one parent is paying tax)and not support those who need specialised fertility treatment (where typically both individuals are working and contributing tax).

Shire Blog

Latest Blog

Infertile couples paying a heavy price for Labor

Comments